


Welcome To Night Vale High School AU

by finefunkyandfresh



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-05-30 21:12:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 8,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19411498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/finefunkyandfresh/pseuds/finefunkyandfresh
Summary: Carlos is new to Night Vale High School, Cecil is madly in love, you know the drill





	1. A Friendly Desert High School

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carlos is new in town

Carlos was not particularly excited about moving from his hometown and into a place called Night Vale smack dab in the middle of nowhere. However, it was what it was, and at least the town was interesting.  
To the view of an outsider, Night Vale was a normal little town, but upon closer inspection you would see that it was odd, to say the least. For example, as Carlos and his family pulled up to their new house, a troop of girl scouts marched by, except, they didn’t seem to be doing the usual girl scout things. It was hard to explain. Night Vale wasn’t the weirdest thing, but it had some strange occurrences.  
So, no, Carlos wasn’t excited about moving to Night Vale, but he couldn’t complain, because he could make the best of watching the weird citizens go about their day.

***

Carlos shuffled into his first class of the day on his first day of Sophomore year at Night Vale High School. Agriculture with Mr. Peters. Carlos wasn’t exactly sure why he was taking agriculture as he had precisely zero interest in it, not to mention he was most definitely not enrolled in agriculture in his previous school, and as such would have no idea what was going on, but, whatever.  
The rest of the day dragged on and Carlos was getting restless, that is until Chemistry.  
Science was Carlos’ passion, so he had high hopes for this class. He entered the room and noticed a large terrarium with five snakes in it. Wow, class pets!  
So far, Carlos had not made any friends, but as always, science came in clutch. His lab partner, Nilanjana, was fairly sociable, and as interested in science as Carlos. Perfect! He had someone to eat lunch with, Thank God.

***

“So,” Said Nilanjana, stirring what looked to be soup absentmindedly, “Welcome to Night Vale High, Carlos.”  
“Thank you.” Carlos nodded.  
Nilanjana gestured to the rest of the people sitting at the lunch table with them. “Everybody, this is Carlos.”  
“Hi” echoed the group teens. Mark, Lusia, Stan, Rachelle, and Dave, as Carlos was soon to learn.  
“Hi.” He said back.

“So, tell me about the school.” Carlos asked, more to Nilanjana than the others.  
“What about it?”  
“I don’t know, is there anything I need to know? Give me the cliché high school movie montage run down.”  
“Hmm.” Pondered Nilanjana for a moment. “I guess I’ll just tell you all the weird shit about this place then. First, we have the Glow Cloud-” she was interjected by a bored chorus of “All Hail” from the kids surrounding them.  
“Pardon?” Carlos chuckled, a little off-put.  
“Right, so at one point in Night Vale High School’s history, someone spray painted some, like, Graffiti on one of the walls in the school. They tried to get it off but they couldn’t and no one really wanted to paint over it, so people just started calling it the Glow Cloud. People leave shit there before tests and stuff. It’s kind of like a, shrine? I guess?”  
“Wow. Ok. Starting off strong.”  
“Heh, yeah. What else. Oh! You know Ms. Dubinski, Chem teacher, yeah?”  
Carlos nodded in affirmation.  
“Did you see her tank filled with snakes?”  
“Yeah, what’s up with those?” Carlos asked.  
“Well, there’s five of them, and they’re all named Hiram. No one knows why.”  
“Do go on.”  
“So for some reason here in Night Vale, Erika is a wildly popular name, so there’s just this, like, gaggle of girls that all hang out together named Erika. What else what else, oh! Student Council is practically a cult, stay away from that, annnd, stay away from the dog park by the school, that place is hella shady.”

Like Carlos said, he wasn’t going to get bored here in Night Vale.


	2. Chapter Two: Electric Boogaloo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carlos asks Nilanjana about Cecil Palmer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry I couldn't think of a chapter title

On Carlos’ second day in Night Vale, he shuffles into the agriculture classroom and takes a seat. He hears a booming voice give the announcements through the loudspeaker, just like yesterday.  
“Good morning students and teachers of Night Vale. Before I start with the usual announcements, we have something very interesting. A new student! That’s right, everyone, our very own Night Vale High has a new student for the first time since 1993! His name is Carlos and he has very nice hair. . .”  
The voice went on to say a variety of flattering things but Carlos didn’t hear any of it, as he had sunk down in his chair, cheeks tinted from embarrassment.   
How was he the first new student in so long? No wonder everyone had been looking at him this whole time, he was practically the eighth wonder of the world to them.  
Carlos was relieved when announcements finally ended and Mr. Peters was able to get on with the lesson.

***

*Meanwhile, in room N101*

“Palmer what the hell.” Maureen asked, staring at Cecil Palmer, president of NVHS Radio Club.  
“What?” Cecil responded innocently.   
“Why the fuck were you mooning over that new kid so hard?”  
“I wasn’t!” Cecil defended himself, quite weakly.  
“Beautiful hair, teeth like a cemetery, come on dude.”  
“I was just stating the facts!” Cecil made in a lame attempt to salvage his reputation.  
“Whatever.”  
“Yeah he was probably pretty embarrassed.” Dana said from the corner as she packed up the equipment.   
“I would be pretty embarrassed if on my second day of school some guy broadcasted his huge crush to the whole school.” chuckled Kareem.  
Cecil rolled his eyes. “You guys suck. Let’s just get to class. I don’t have a crush.”

***

In Chemistry that day, Carlos asks Nilanjana about the boy on the announcements.   
“So, who was that guy doing the announcements this morning?”  
“Oh! Cecil Palmer? Yeah he’s. He’s something alright.” Nilanjana chuckles.  
“A good something?” Carlos asks.  
Nilanjana looks at him. “That depends I guess. He’s just kind of odd. I mean, everything about this town is odd, but Cecil’s just a weird dude I guess. He’s pretty nice though. I think you’d like him. Sounds like he likes you.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Well you heard on the announcements. He was going all off on you and how cute you are.”  
“He was?!” Carlos is slightly surprised.  
“Wh-you didn’t hear him? He went on about you for, like, thirty entire seconds before you could hear someone behind him telling him to shut up and get on with it. How did you not hear that?”  
“I guess I must have zoned out.” Carlos, of course, had been too embarrassed about existing to hear any of the announcements. Their conversation was cut short as Ms. Dubinski glared at them from her desk, causing Carlos and Nilanjana to quickly look back down at their worksheets.


	3. Nice Bolo Tie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil and Carlos run into eachother-literally

“. . .and now a very important message concerning the cafeteria. Please avoid consuming any wheat or wheat byproducts. It would appear that school’s supply of wheat has been contaminated. If possible, try to bring your own lunch for the next week or so. . .”   
Carlos ran through the almost empty halls, desperately trying to reach his first class. He couldn’t believe he was late to class this early in the year. He heard the announcements cut off and not moments later he ran straight into a boy walking out of the radio classroom.   
Carlos stumbled backwards and gave the kid a onceover.  
He was wearing the Guy Fieri shirt but the flames were rainbows, pink mom jeans with hearts all over them, absolutely disgusting glitter boots and a bolo tie with an eye pendant on it. There was a lot going on with this outfit and Carlos wasn’t really sure what to think, so he said “Nice Bolo Tie.”  
The guy gave a huge grin at that. “Thanks! I’m Cecil!”  
That name rung a bell. And so did that very nice, smooth voice. Oh shit. “Cecil? Cecil Palmer?” Carlos asked.  
“Yep. That’s me.” he chuckled awkwardly.   
“I’m Carlos.” Carlos introduced himself.  
“I know.” Cecil said. “Buh, I mean, you’re new here, so.” he stuttered.   
“Yeah. Well, um. I should get to class. See you around, I guess.” Carlos picked up the book he had dropped and scooched around Cecil, who was standing frozen in the middle of the hall, clutching his bolo tie.   
He spun around “Wait, Carlos.”  
“Yeah?”  
“Um. You should consider joining radio. We do the announcements.”  
“I’ll think about it.” Carlos smiled.  
“Great! N101 after school.”  
“I’ll see you then.” Carlos turned around and started walking again. He smiled to himself.

***

Cecil plopped his wheat and wheat byproduct free lunch down by Dana dramatically.   
Maureen glanced up from her phone. “Ok. I don’t know how you managed to be so dramatic about sitting, but please just spill whatever’s on your mind so we don’t have to deal with your theatrics for too long.”  
Too lovesick to be offended by Maureen’s comment, Cecil began, “Guess who I ran into today?” He asked. “Carlos. It was Carlos.” He finished without giving his friends even a second to ponder the question.  
“Oh boy.” Said someone.  
“That’s right. He said he liked my bolo tie.” Cecil gushed. “And you know that ‘nice bolo tie’ is the greatest compliment one could ever receive.”   
“Okay Cecil.” Maureen rolled her eyes.  
“And here’s the kicker.” Cecil wiggled his eyebrows. “I got him to join radio. He’s coming today after school.”  
“Are you serious??” Dana asked. “That’s great! We need more people in radio.”  
“Yeah especially since Cecil here keeps scaring everyone away.”  
Cecil sent a glare in Maureen’s direction for that one. 

The lunch conversation soon drifted.  
“So elections for class president are coming up.” Dana said. “I think I might run.”   
“Really? That’s awesome!” said Chad.  
“Wow. You have my vote!” Smiled Kareem. “Will you have time for radio if you win?”  
“I hope so. Probably not as much, but, I mean. I probably won’t win anyway.” She sighed.  
“Don’t be crazy, Dana, you’re awesome, and everyone loves you. And you’d make an excellent class president. I’m sure you will win.” Cecil reassured her.   
“Maybe.” Dana shrugged.

***

Carlos looked at his arm as the last seconds of the day ticked by. N101 the purple marker on his wrist reminded him.   
As soon as the bell rang, Carlos was out of his seat and into N101.   
Upon entering the room every head spun Carlos’s way.  
“Um, hi.” he said cautiously.   
“Carlos!” Cecil approached Carlos and guided him from cowering in the doorway to cowering further into the room. “Everybody this is Carlos. He will be trying out Radio club.”  
Carlos gave a little wave. “Hi.” His voice cracked.  
“Um, ok, Carlos, this is Maureen, Dana, Chad, and Kareem.” Cecil gestured to the rag tag bunch of Radio Club members scattered around the room.

A man walked out. “Oh, a new recruit? Excellent!” Said the man. “I’m Mr. Burton. Club sponsor for Radio. Most of these kids call me Leonard, though. What’s your name, son?”  
“Carlos.”  
“It is excellent to meet you. Welcome to Night Vale and welcome to Radio.” he beamed.

And so began Carlos’s high school career in morning announcements.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Nice bolo tie is the greatest compliment a person can ever receive"-Welcome To Night Vale Episode Nine (PYRAMID)


	4. The Lights in Radon Canyon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they go to Radon Canyon yeehaw

About a month had passed since Carlos had moved to the friendly desert community known as Night Vale and he had finally settled into the swing of things. Radio club wasn’t exactly the most exciting thing for Carlos-he still was interested mainly in science- but he went almost everyday without fail because, well, he enjoyed hanging out with the Radio people. They were nice.   
If you made a pie chart of how Carlos spent his time outside of class, it would be 10 percent doing nerd things such as looking at books about space, 15 percent talking to Nilanjana, 20 percent homework, 20 percent radio club related things, and 35 percent looking at Cecil Gershwin Palmer.  
Of course, Carlos thought to himself, it wasn’t that he had a crush on Cecil, it’s just that, well, it’s hard to not look at the guy.  
His outfits were absolutely insane. Is it really Carlos’s fault that he couldn’t stop looking at a guy who wore sweatpants that had the nineties blue and purple dixie cup swirly thing plastered all over them! And could one be blamed for gawking at a shirt that has a rainbow cowboy on it that says “I AM A GAY COWBOY.” And really, Carlos is sure that everybody must stare at Cecil’s shiny converse that have giant butterfly wings literally coming off of them.  
Carlos wasn’t staring at Cecil himself, just his. . .interesting fashion statements. That was it and there was nothing else to it. Absolutely nothing else. It wasn’t Cecil’s hair or face or oh God, his eyes, it was his leggings covered head to toe in teeth.  
Carlos was very good at being in denial.

His train of thought was interrupted by a tap on the shoulder. Carlos turned around. “Hey Dana.”  
“Hi Carlos.” she smiled. “We’re going to a concert tonight. Wanna come?”  
“Sure! When and where?”  
“It’s at Radon Canyon. It’ll be great.” Dana left.  
“Dana-where the fuck is that? Can I maybe get some directions?” Carlos called after her but to no avail. He sighed and turned back around. He would be able to find it. That was the thing about Night Vale. Even with no idea about this mysterious canyon, Carlos would find himself there.  
Just to be safe though, he texted Nilanjana. 

Carlos: Going to concert at Radon Canyon tonight wanna come?

Nilanjana: Hell ye

Carlos: gr8 can I have a ride?

Nilanjana: < :-( fine. Ill pick u up at 7

Carlos: thx boo 

***

Carlos had no idea who the band is at Radon Canyon. . .someone called “The Lights”. They’re pretty mediocre but everyone has a good time. Afterwards, the crew invites Carlos and Nilanjana to go to Big Rico’s Pizza with them.  
“No one does a slice like Big Ricos. No one.” Cecil explains.

***

Cecil is right. The pizza is delicious. Big Rico’s kind of has Denny’s vibes, Carlos thinks. It’s a very surreal experience, but of course, it’s midnight and he’s eating pizza in Night Vale, so, that’s what’s expected.  
Carlos is having a good time, laughing as Cecil complains about Steve Carlsberg, yet again, and as they give advice to Dana about running for Class President.   
“How abouuut. . .hm. . .Dana is Cardinal to our school’s success please vote for her. For your slogan.” Kareem says and chugs down a full glass of orange juice.  
“How about, no.” Dana laughs.

“Well, I think it’s time we get going.” Carlos yawned, glaring at Nilanjana, who was making a castle out of ketchup cups.  
“Aw man. Why so soon?” whined Cecil.  
“Soon? It is Two in the morning. I’m surprised we haven’t been kicked out at this point.”   
“I guess you’re right. See you Monday.” Cecil said.  
Carlos’s stomach did a flip. He couldn’t blame it on the clothes this time because Cecil was wearing normal clothes tonight (by Cecil standards, that is, he was, in fact wearing rainbow adidas pants and a mesh shirt, see through doc martens and fingerless gloves, but this was nothing compared to the usual) so instead, Carlos blamed it on Big Rico’s pizza.   
“Bye.”


	5. Kevin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is short oops

"God Cecil you are so in love." Maureen teased Cecil as they made their way through the crowded hall.   
"Says you." Scoffed Cecil.  
"What’s that supposed to mean?" She asked defensively.  
"Michelle Nguyen? Yeah I see you making heart eyes at her constantly."  
"Wh-nooo, we are Just Friends, Cecil."  
"Aight." Cecil said dismissively.  
Maureen groaned.

Meanwhile Carlos and his gang of nerds made their way down the same hall.   
"Is it just me, or would Carlos and Cecil make a hella cute couple?" Rachelle asked.  
"Definitely just you." Said Carlos.  
"No it's all of us." Everyone agreed.  
"Look, there he is! Go talk to him!" Nilanjana pointed to where Cecil and Maureen were walking and shoved him in their direction.  
"Ok. I'll go talk to them. Because we are Friends." Carlos rolled his eyes, putting emphasis on friends.

"Hey Cecil, sup Maureen." Carlos greeted and fell into step with the two.  
"Hiii." Maureen said with a hint of mischief in her voice. "I think I need to go do something, yeah I gotta take a piss, bye you two." Maureen bounced off.  
Cecil blushed brightly. "So." He said.  
"So." Carlos replied.  
"What class you headed to?"  
"First period. Agriculture with Mr. Peters, you know, the teacher?" Carlos said.  
"Ah yes. I've got math with Mr. Marvin" 

The two boys continued to chat as they walked down the hall. But then Carlos noticed Cecil aggressively adjust his propeller hat and glared down the hallway. 

Carlos squinted his eyes to see what Cecil was looking at. "Cecil, do you have a brother?" He asked as his eyes landed on a better dressed version of Cecil.  
"Nope, that would be Kevin." Cecil spat, venom evident in his voice.  
"Could you maybe elaborate on that bud?"   
"Kevin is my enemy, and for some reason, doppelganger. He's the president of TV club, aka the bane of Radio's existence."   
"So you just hate him because he's in a different club than you?" Carlos raised an eyebrow.  
"Oh come on it's not just that!" Protested Cecil. "He may look like me but if you look into his eyes you can sense the evil. I swear."  
"Okay buddy." Carlos laughed.  
"Ugh forget it. All you need to know is he sucks ass."

The boys went to their respective classes.


	6. The firing of Leonard Bulton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some shocking news

Dana Cardinal was running for class president and that was final. She had made this decision in French earlier that day whilst conjugating. Since then she had been plotting her campaign. She was ready and she wasn’t going to let anyone beat her.  
So, as soon as school ended she rushed to the school library, avoiding the librarians, and took as many supplies as she could carry, including posters, papers, markers, glue, and the like.   
Arms full, she stumbled into N101 with a bang. “I’m running for class president!” She announced brightly and dropped her supplies on the table. “Would you guys mind helping out with my campaign? You don’t have to if you don’t want but-” Dana noticed that no one was reacting to her announcement. She would have thought that her friends would be excited for her.  
She looked around the room. Everybody was slumped in their chairs looking at the ground. “Guys?” Asked Dana.   
Kareem was the one to break the news. “Leonard got fired.” he let out a sigh.  
“Excuse me?” Dana was shocked. Sure Mr. Bulton wasn’t the most competent teacher around, but why on Earth would he be fired?  
“Apparently he confiscated some weed from a student and was using it.” he explained.  
“Are you kidding me?” Dana sat down in a chair, shocked. “So what does this mean for radio?”  
“We have no idea. I sent Ms. Winchell an email asking about it but she hasn’t responded.” Kareem rubbed his temples.  
“Well every club needs a club sponsor right?” Dana asked.  
“Yeah, and Leonard was ours, so now we don’t have one. So technically this club can’t continue unless they give us someone else.”  
“I doubt they will.” Cecil said. “No teacher really wants to sponsor our club. And even if they did, I doubt the school would just send them over to us. I swear the faculty just hates us.”

The kids sat dejectedly in N101 for a few minutes.  
“So, I guess we just have to find a club sponsor our self.” Carlos said finally.  
Everyone looked up. “You’re right, Carlos. But who?” Cecil asked.  
“Beats me! It’s my first month at this school. You guys know it better than me.”  
“Fair enough.” said Cecil. “It’s settled. If the school won’t give us a club sponsor we’ll give ourselves one. Tomorrow everyone meet at the Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex at, say, 4?”  
“Ooh, I can’t make that. Can we do 4:30.”  
“Of course Chad. 4:30 at the bowling alley everyone. We’re keeping this club alive if it kills us.” Cecil said, very serious expression upon his face.  
“Well I’m not dying for radio, but sure, I’ll be there.” Maureen said. 

***

Carlos received a text that afternoon as he worked on his essay on teen pregnancy for health. 

Cecil: ur coming tomorrow right

Carlos: of course

Cecil: kool just making sure. See you then

Cecil: actually i was wondering

Cecil: everyone is getting there at 4:30 but my sister can olny drop me off at 4. 

Cecil: *only

Cecil: anyway do you wanna come early with me? My sister can bring us right after school

Cecil put his phone down, breathing heavily. Quintuple text. Bold move. He waited anxiously for a reply.

Carlos: sure where should I wait after school for you

Cecil: just go outside right by the door by the gc

Carlos: the wut

Cecil: gc=glow cloud

Carlos: oh. All Hail

Cecil: All Hail

It was a date. Cecil smiled to himself. Across the town, in a different house, Carlos smiled to himself as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow my bad for being so bad at writing a substantial amount oop


	7. Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the gang tries to find a club sponsor

Carlos walked out the school doors, absentmindedly giving the Glow Cloud a quick salute as he passed.  
Stepping out into the blinding sun, Cecil was nowhere to be found. Damn. Carlos had forgotten to ask what his sister or his sister’s car looked like. Carlos sent a quick message to Cecil questioning his whereabouts.  
After an awkward minute or two, Cecil came running out the doors of the school. “Carlos! Hey. Right this way.”  
Carlos followed Cecil into the backseat of a disgustingly purple slug bug.   
At the driver’s seat was what Carlos could only assume to be Cecil’s sister, Abby. Seated next to her in the passenger seat was a good looking boy who introduced himself as Steve Carslberg.  
“Hi, I’m Abby.” Cecil’s sister smiled at Carlos via rearview mirror. Carlos smiled back. “You must be Carlos! I’ve heard a lot about you.”  
“You have?” Carlos asked, surprised. Next to him, Cecil blushed bright red. 

The car ride should have been very pleasant, seeing as Abby and her boyfriend Steve were possibly the nicest people Carlos had ever met, but the whole vibe was ruined by the ice cold energy radiating off of Cecil.  
The entire time Cecil was glaring daggers into the back of Steve’s seat. Carlos couldn’t understand why, because Steve seemed to be a really great boyfriend to Abby. Clearly Cecil had some beef with Steve and was not anticipating his attendance on the little car ride.  
Luckily, Carlos didn’t have to suffer for long, because before he knew it they were at the Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex.  
“You boys have fun!” Steve called out at them as they made their way out of the car. Carlos gave a quick smile and nod to Steve while Cecil ignored him entirely.

Once inside, Cecil’s demeanor shifted. “So, what do you wanna do?”  
“Um, the arcade sounds fun.” Carlos said.

Part way through Carlos beating Cecil’s ass in Galaga Cecil began venting. “Isn’t Steve Fucking Carlsberg just the worst?” he asked, throwing his hands up in the air.  
Carlos wasn’t sure what to say. “Well, I don’t think so. He seems really nice.”  
“Well maybe he seems that way, but trust me, he’s vile. If he was dating your sister you’d know.”   
Carlos thought Cecil was definitely exaggerating but he elected to stay silent on the matter.

Once the awkward matter of Steve Carlsberg was out of the way, Carlos sincerely enjoyed his time with Cecil at the Arcade. But the longer he spent with him the farther down he had to push down a feeling in his stomach that he might have a crush.  
Carlos was not the type to have crushes, or relationships for that matter. He would just rather not get entangled in that sort of thing, but with every passing minute, Cecil’s cuteness meter seemed to rise exponentially.

Carlos was saved from confronting his feelings when the rest of the crew started trickling in. First Dana and Kareem walked in together, a little bit before the scheduled time, followed by Chad at 4:31 and finally a fashionably late Maureen at 4:37.

“About time.” Cecil scoffed in Maureen’s direction. She rolled her eyes and tossed some money at Cecil to cover her bowling expenses.   
They all took turns bowling, stalling a little bit before they got to the subject at hand.   
“So,” Chad said as he picked up a ball, “What’s the plan.”  
“Well, Chad, that’s what we’re here to figure out.” Maureen said. “Which teacher doesn’t hate any of us? I’m sure there’s at least two.”  
They racked their brains. “How about Dubinski?” Carlos asked, as that was the only teacher he really liked.   
“Ha, that’s a no. I may or may not have almost killed one her snakes. Hiram of the Violet variety, I believe.” Cecil admitted.  
“Damnit Ceec.”

They kept running through every teacher in the school, only to find that they all had it out for someone in the group, usually Cecil or Maureen, and one even hated Dana.  
“What, I’m just really bad at French.” she sighed.

Finally, they landed on Mr. Harlen.  
“The cooking teacher?” Kareem asked, dismayed. “Would he be even slightly qualified to be in charge of radio?”   
“Do qualifications really matter?” Maureen pointed out. “We’re pretty competent on our own, the only reason we need a club sponsor is because it’s required.”  
“Ok. So, Mr. Harlen, then.” Kareem chucked a ball down the alley, somehow resulting in his first non-gutter ball of the game. “YES!” he jumped in the air as the ball knocked over a measly two pins.   
“Wait, Cecil,” Chad asked, “Didn’t you have a thing with Mr. Harlen’s son? And didn’t you like, break the kid’s heart?”  
“Uhh, yeah, but I’m pretty sure Mr. Harlen wasn’t even aware of it.”

Cecil? A heartbreaker? That didn’t seem very likely to Carlos. He changed the subject. “How would we get him to be the club sponsor? Do we just ask him?”  
“Well.” said Chad. “I happen to know that Mr. Harlen is just dying to teach people to cook that aren’t disinterested kids that took his class because they thought it would be easy.”  
“What are you saying?” Dana, a notoriously bad cook asked, terror evident in her voice.  
“If I ask him to give us all a little cooking lesson, he will be forever grateful, and we can bring it up then!”   
Dana put her head in her hands. “Oh boy.”  
“Sounds good to me.” Cecil said. “Could you get that organized for us, Chad?”  
“Of course.”

Carlos looked at the screen above their lane. “Looks like our two hours are almost up. You guys ready to dip?”  
“Not so fast.” Maureen said. “We’re not leaving until the last second. I’m getting my money’s worth of this overpriced bowling.  
“Maureen it was literally only six dollars, this is hella cheap.” Kareem laughed, but stopped dead when Maureen shot him a glare. “Ok, let's keep bowling for two more minutes.” Kareem sent a ball down the alley.

They had a plan.


	8. The Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maureen receives an email from Pamela Winchell.

Chapter Eight

Maureen: Guys come quick Ms. Winchell just emailed me

Chad: shit what does it say???

Maureen: idk i haven’t opened it yet

Maureen: i’m waiting for u guys first

Cecil: On my way!!!!!!

Five teenagers raced into room N101, eager to read Maureen’s email.   
“Quick! Open it!” Cecil shouted.  
Maureen took a deep breath. “Here goes nothing.” she opened it.

Dear students of Radio Club,

I regret to inform you that the school was unable to find any teacher willing to run your club. Unfortunately, Radio will have to disband for the time being. TV Will take over morning announcements.

-Pamela Winchell, Dean of Students, Night Vale High School

“Goddamnit.” Kareem said.  
No one said anything for a solid ten seconds, and then Cecil stormed out of the room.  
“Cecil!” Carlos called. “Where are you going?”  
Cecil turned his head over his shoulder. “To go talk to that bitch Kevin.”  
“Oh boy.” said Maureen.  
Carlos sputtered nervously and then chased after Cecil.

When he caught up to the boy, Cecil had already found Kevin and was standing inches away from his face.  
“Fuck you Kevin.”  
“What did I do?” Kevin feigned innocence.  
“Radio club is gone and I know it’s your fault.”  
“Who, me? Don’t be silly, Cecil, how on Earth would I have gotten Mr. Burton fired?”  
“No, not that, I know you’re behind us not getting a new sponsor. You want to do the announcements. I don’t know how y-” Cecil fumed.  
Kevin ignored him, continuing to talk about Mr. Burton. “Really, you should have seen this coming. Burton was an old fool and I’m surprised it took him this long to get fired.”

It was true, but he shouldn’t have said it.

Before Carlos could do anything, Cecil had thrown a punch in Kevin’s direction. Kevin managed to dodge it, and Cecil’s fist only grazed Kevin’s cheek. Kevin shoved Cecil backwards, banging him into a locker and punched him in the face, then left.  
Carlos ran over as soon as Kevin started walking away. “Cecil!”   
Cecil had slumped down to the floor, and was scowling, eye already starting to swell. It was bright red. “That was stupid.” Carlos said as he pulled Cecil up.  
“Thanks.”  
“Let’s get on the bus before Principal Huntokar catches wind of what just happened.” 

Carlos walked Cecil to his bus. “Do you want me to go home with you?” Carlos asked. “It’s just-I know Abby works after school so no one will be there, and you probably shouldn’t be alone with that eye, you need so-”  
Cecil shushed Carlos’s rambling, placing a finger to his lips. “Yes, thank you. That would be great.”  
Carlos smiled and boarded the bus behind Cecil.


	9. Cookies and Khoshekh and Claritin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carlos tends to Cecil's black eye

Cecil opened the door to his house, beckoning Carlos in. The place was small, but cozy.  
“Ok, idiot, sit down.” Carlos gently shoved Cecil onto a couch. “Where’s your bathroom? I’m going to fix your damn face.”  
“It’s just down the hall there, to your right.”  
Carlos entered the bathroom and the first thing he noticed was that there was no mirror. Odd. He opened various cabinets, searching for the supplies he needed. Once fully stocked on Tylenol and Neosporin he headed back out. “Do you have any frozen peas or anything?” Carlos asked.  
“No, but I think there should be an ice pack in the freezer.” Carlos moved over to the kitchen. “Could you grab a box of Thin Mints while you’re at it?” Cecil asks from the couch.  
Carlos rolls his eyes and opens the pantry. He is greeted by a full shelf of girl scout cookies. “Holy shit, Cecil. Why do you have so many girl scout cookies?” he grabs a green box and tosses it to the couch before opening the freezer.  
“Some little girl scout came by and she said no one had bought any cookies yet and she really wanted to win the prize for selling the most cookies, so I kinda bought them all.”  
Carlos shook his head and chuckled. “Cecil, she probably used that line on everyone.”  
“I know, I know, but I felt bad.”  
Carlos pressed the ice pack to Cecil’s face. Who knew the guy who just punched another guy was such a softie.  
“What’s the Neosporin for?” Cecil popped a thin mint in his mouth and put his hand over Carlos’s, in an attempt to take hold of the ice pack on his own.  
Carlos blushed at the contact and moved his hand away quickly. “Um, you have a cut under your eye. Apparently Kevin doesn’t clip his nails.” He motioned for Cecil to take the ice pack off so he could apply the Neosporin. He sees that Cecil’s eye is swollen and starting to bruise.  
Carlos squirted a bit of it on his fingertip and dabbed it on the cut under Cecil’s eye. He rubbed it in gently, looking into Cecil’s piercing eyes. He suddenly found himself short of breath as his finger rested on Cecil’s cheek, their eyes locked.  
Their tender moment was broken when Carlos felt the sudden urge to sneeze. He broke away, violently sneezing into the crook of his elbow. A cat sauntered up to him, jumping from furniture to furniture.  
“Sorry.” Carlos sniffled. “I’m allergic to cats.”  
Said cat took the liberty to rub his head on Carlos, who had fallen onto the floor.  
“I’m so sorry.” Cecil leaned down and scooped up the cat. “This is Khoshekh.”  
Carlos stood up and brushed himself off. “That’s an odd name.”  
“It’s Hebrew for darkness.” Cecil explained. “Do you want some Claritin? It’s in the bathroom.”  
“Well, he is black so I guess that’s fitting. Yes thank you, I’ll go grab it.”  
Carlos came back to Cecil. Khoshekh had disappeared into some other corner of the house. “Thanks for the Claritin.” he said.  
“No problem.” Cecil adjusted his ice pack. “I find Claritin is a very useful drug. It can cure junior arthritis, you know.”  
“Junior-are you sure that’s a thing?” Carlos asked. He plopped down on the couch next to Cecil and grabbed a Thin Mint.  
“It definitely is.” Cecil said.  
Carlos nodde, slightly confused. “So, um, sorry about Radio. I know that it’s pretty important to you.”  
A determined look grew over Cecil’s face. “Don’t worry. We’ll get it back. I know we will. We just need to talk to Mr. Harlen, and I need to get to the bottom of whatever Kevin is up to.”  
“Cecil, I’m gonna be honest with you, I don’t think Kevin has anything to do with this.”  
“No, Carlos, trust me. He wants TV to be in charge of announcements so he made sure we didn’t get a new club sponsor. I’m one hundred percent sure.”

Cecil turned something on the TV and the pair watched in silence. After a moment Carlos said “So what’s your deal with Steve?” he asked. He didn’t mean to sound accusing, but he kind of was.  
Cecil’s eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”  
“Well, it’s just that. Well he’s super nice. And he seems like a really great boyfriend to your sister. They’ve both graduated right?”  
“Yeah they graduated last year.” Cecil frowned.  
“Well?” Carlos said expectantly.  
“Well what.” Cecil spat.  
“Why do you hate him.”

Cecil sighed and turned to face Carlos. “Abby raises me. She’s only nineteen and she has to raise me because our parents are gone. But she doesn’t only have to raise me.” He took a breath. “Last year Steve got her pregnant. It was an accident. But now Abby has two whole human beings to take care of. I can’t just forgive Steve for that, ya know?”  
“Oh.” Carlos said. He hadn’t expected that. “Does Steve help with the baby?” he asked, unsure of what to say.  
“Yeah, he has her right now. While Abby works. I think they’re at the park, actually.”  
Carlos nodded awkwardly. He was no counselor but he thought that if Cecil was living with this very nice guy, he might as well not hate him. “You should talk it out with the guy. It was an accident after all. And he’s a great guy.”  
Cecil shrugged. “I suppose.”

After that, the conversation shifted to cooking with Mr. Harlen, which Chad confirmed would be happening on Tuesday after school. Carlos didn’t realize how long he had spent with Cecil until Steve Carlsberg himself came waltzing through the door, baby on hip at five o’clock. Carlos took that at his cue to leave.  
He gave a meaningful wink as he shrugged his bag over his shoulder. “See ya, Cecil. Feel better.”  
He slid out into the street, the last thing he heard was Steve asking Cecil what in tarnation had happened to his eye.  
He hoped his little talk with Cecil would lead him to forgive Steve. Carlos walked home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Steve Carlsberg is a stay at home dad you can fight me on this


	10. Campaign

“What in tarnation happened to your eye, Cecil?” Steve asked, concerned.   
“Nothing you need to know.” Cecil said, mentally cursing at Carlos for leaving him right at that moment.   
Steve pursed his lips. “Alright. Well if you’re ever ready to talk about it. . .” he turned and walked away, carrying Janice to her crib.  
Cecil thought about what Carlos had said. “Wait. Steve.” He said. Steve turned around. Cecil was already regretting this. “I got into a fight. With Kevin. He punched me-well, I tried to punch him first and then he-yeah.” Cecil looked down. He didn’t know why he was telling Steve this; this wasn’t at all helpful to their relationship that Carlos was so convinced needed fixing.  
Steve nodded. “Thanks for telling me bud. You mind if I go put Janice to bed and we can talk about this more?”  
Cecil really didn’t want to talk about this more. “Yeah, ok.” he said anyway.

Steve returned and sat next to Cecil on the couch. “What was the fight about?” he asked.  
“Ok, I changed my mind I don’t want to talk about this.”  
“Okay.” Steve started to stand up again.  
“Wait.”  
“Cecil, you’re going to have to make up your mind here.”  
“I just-wanted to talk about something else.” Cecil explained. “I’m just really sorry.”  
“What for?” Steve asked.  
Cecil groaned. Why was this so difficult? “For, like, being a total bitch to you for no reason.”  
“Oh.” said Steve. “Thank you Cecil. Maybe don’t say bitch.”  
Cecil smirked at him. “Ok get out of here before I change my mind.”   
Steve stood up for the last time, giving Cecil a light pat on the back. Apparently science wasn’t the only thing Carlos knew a thing or two about. 

***

On Monday when Carlos shuffled into Agriculture for another week at school, rather than hearing Cecil’s beautiful voice come over the PA, a familiar face filled the screen of the electronic classroom board. Kevin was seated next to some girl. Both were dressed in yellow (the worse of the school’s two colors.)   
“Good morning Night Vale! Bringing you your announcements today are me, Kevin Triptych and Lauren Mallard!”   
Lauren waved “Hello everybody, today's anouncements are. . .”  
Carlos didn’t care to listen to the announcements, so he took to doodling in his notebook. He was snapped out of his daze by the most midwestern voice he had ever heard in his life. He looked up at the screen and saw a girl whos hair was even bigger than her accent. In fact it was so large and poofy that it obstructed most of her face, somewhat like a patch of auburn haze covering her.   
“Hey Night Vale High School! Do you like having a good time? Do you enjoy hanging out with friends, or perhaps, a lover? Do you worship the Glow Cloud? All Hail. If you answered yes to any of these questions, you should consider attending Homecoming this year! That’s right! This year’s Homecoming is Glow Cloud themed! Be sure to wear your best outfit and bring an offering! See ya there folks!” Hair girl, who had been walking around the school with a microphone bumped into a locker. “OPE!” She exclaimed, “Deb out!” the camera cut back to Kevin and Lauren.

As Kevin began to wrap up announcements, Carlos pondered Homecoming. He hadn’t gone last year, but now that he had all these friends, he was thinking it might be fun. After all, most things in Night Vale were. Carlos looked back down to the doodles he was in the process of making, dismayed to discover that he had been absentmindedly drawing none other than Cecil.   
He scribbled out the drawings and turned his attention back to Mr. Peters, you know, the teacher, who was in the process of attempting to shut the board off. 

Meanwhile, in Mr. Marvin’s math classroom, one angry Cecil Palmer fumed. He glared into the screen where Kevin’s disgusting face had just disappeared. He was going to get to the bottom of this.

***

Dana: You guys wanna help me w my campaign? I’m in the library

Chad: sure

Carlos: ofc

Kareem: Hell yeah!

Cecil: sorreeyy i can’t I’m in detention 4 the k*vin thing :////

Maureen: Ya sure

Dana’s campaign had been going slowly but surely. Her name had started to pop up over the halls, posters about. Cecil had promoted her in the announcements, though now that it was TV in charge, there was a slim chance of that happening again.   
Although people knew she was running, she needed the gang’s help to really promote herself.   
They gathered at a table in the back corner of the library, far away from the librarians.   
“Ok, we need to make posters and buttons and I need to write my speech for what I’ll do if I win!”  
“When you win.” Kareem corrected.  
“Heh, thanks.”

The group got to work. They churned out buttons galore, though the posters weren’t that great to look at.  
“So the candidate debate is soon, so I need to practice my debating skills. Anyone up for that?” Dana asked, looking around the table.  
“I will!” volunteered Kareem.  
“Thanks.”

As Kareem and Dana practice-debated, Carlos noticed Maureen looking down at her phone a lot-well, more than usual. “Watcha doin’?” he asked.  
“None of your business.” Maureen said with the usual amount of salt, but there was some sugar underneath.  
“Are you reading the new chapter of Cecil’s Jaws fanfiction?” Chad asked, deciding to join in on the fun of heckling the Heckler of the group.  
“No it’s not out yet.” Maureen said.  
“Wait what?” Carlos said, forgetting about the matter at hand.  
“Cecil didn’t tell you?” Chad asked. “He writes a ton of Jaws fanfiction.”

Carlos decided not to question it and turned his attention back to Maureen. “Are you texting someone?” he asked.  
Maureen rolled her eyes. “It’s just my friend, Michelle, if you must know.”  
The name rung a bell in Carlos’s mind. “Ah! Is that your crush?” He remembered Cecil saying Maureen had a crush on a girl named Michelle.  
“What?! No!” Maureen heavily protested. “We’re just friends. She works at Dark Owl Records and I go there sometimes to talk to her about music.” Maureen was a spectacular shade of red.  
“Ok, Maureen, seems like you like her but that’s none of my business.” said Carlos.  
“It really isn’t. And I guess it’s none of my business that you have a crush on Cecil.” she smirked.  
Now it was Carlos’s turn to blush. “Ok, now that is definitely not true.”  
“Whatever you say, Carlos. Since you don’t have any feelings whatsoever for Cecil, I’m sure you won’t mind going to Homecoming with someone else.”  
“I won’t mind. If anyone asks me, I will go.” Carlos said.

Hopefully no one asked him to Homecoming, he thought to himself.

***

Cecil tried to sit as far away from Kevin in detention as possible but the universe had apparently decided that was not going to happen. It was quite a workout, attempting not go feral on a guy sitting directly next to you for two hours. About an hour and fifteen minutes in to the detention session, Mr. Kipp decided to take a quick bathroom break, allowing Cecil to direct a quick ferocious glare at Kevin.  
“Looking a little beat up, there, Cecil.” Kevin leaned over and whispered. “Does the other guy look as bad as you?” he smirked, knowing full well that the '‘other guy'’ was sitting right there with scarcely a scratch.  
Cecil was proud to say he ignored Kevin’s taunt.   
Until, that is, “Hey, Cecil, Homecoming is coming up, I was just thinking who I should ask.”  
“And who’s that.” Cecil said through grit teeth.  
“That new kid, Carlos.”   
Cecil nearly got whiplash from jerking his head in Kevin’s direction. He tried not to let his crush show through. “I doubt Carlos would say yes to a sorry sack like you, Kevin.”  
“We’ll see.” Kevin smiled.  
Goddamnit. Kevin couldn’t ask Carlos out. Cecil needed to find a way to ask Carlos to Homecoming before Kevin got to him. But that would involve talking about feelings. And Cecil wasn’t very good with feelings. He had already talked to Steve about feelings did he really need to do it with Carlos so soon after? Ok so maybe Cecil would just have to stop Kevin from asking Carlos out rather than asking him out himself. 

Cecil sighed. Why did Kevin always have to ruin everything.


	11. A Cooking Disaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang heads over to Earl Harlen's classroom in an attempt to win him over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me? taking months to write the shortest chapter ever? It's more likely then you think.

The last bell of the day had just rung and it was time for the students of Night Vale High to head home. Not for Carlos and the rest of radio club, though. They had an appointment with Earl Harlan to do some cooking.  
“Ok, see ya Nilanjana, I’m gonna head over to the cooking classroom for that thing.” Carlos said, preparing to leave as he walked Nilanjana to her bus.  
“Wait, Carlos, look who’s coming over!” Nilanjana pointed in front of them, where Carlos saw Kevin, walking towards him. What the fuck did Kevin want? Carlos had a mini panic attack as Kevin stopped dead in front of him.  
“Hey Carlos!” Kevin smiled brightly, his grating voice making Carlos question his entire life.  
“H-hi.” he managed to squeak out. He was pretty sure the only thing that Kevin knew about him was that he was friends with Cecil-and Kevin did not like Cecil.  
“So, I was wondering, Carlos. I know you don’t know me that well, but I was thinking maybe we could get to know each other better. Do you want to go to Homecoming with me?”  
Carlos was shocked. Why would Kevin want to go to Homecoming with him? The obvious answer to Kevin’s question was ‘no’. Carlos couldn’t betray Cecil like that. Going out with your best friend’s mortal enemy? No way. But Nilanjana was looking at Carlos expectantly. Oh shit. The deal.  
Carlos looked frantically back and forth in between the two. Nilanjana was nodding ferociously. “Um, sure.” Carlos said, hesitantly.  
A smile spread over Kevin’s face. “Great!” he said. “Here’s my number. We can figure out the details later.”  
Carlos looked down at the scribbled number on the slip of paper Kevin had handed him. “Great.” He said, trying to sound enthusiastic. It didn’t work. 

After Kevin left, Carlos and Nilanjana parted ways, Nilanjana heading home, and Carlos going to the cooking classroom.

He got there a few minutes late. The group was already settled in a circle around Mr. Harlan, who was giving them a quick safety lesson. Carlos hopped in, embarrassed. “Sorry.” he mouthed to Cecil.

Soon, the group was copying down the recipe Mr. Harlan was planning on teaching. Tiramisu. Carlos leaned over to Cecil. “Sorry I was late.”  
“It’s ok. What took you?” Cecil whispered back.  
“Um. I’ll tell you later.” Carlos didn’t think Mr. Harlan intensely explaining separating egg whites was a good time for telling Cecil that he was going to Homecoming with Kevin. 

~~~

Dana had gone through a full carton of eggs.  
“Dana you only needed to use three eggs what are you doing.” Maureen asked.  
Dana looked up from the recipe wearily. “I keep messing up and I have to restart. My eggs aren’t forming peaks or whatever.”  
Maureen rolled her eyes. “Ok just let me do it.”

As Maureen made Dana’s Tiramisu for her, Cecil approached Carlos.  
“So, why were you late?” he asked. “I mean it’s fine, I was just wondering.”  
Carlos inhaled. “Um, I got held up by Kevin.”  
Cecil’s face immediately knit itself into a scowl. “What did he want?”  
“Well, he asked me to homecoming.” Carlos scratched the back of his neck.  
Cecil’s eyes widened. “You said no, right??”  
“Uhhhhh.” Carlos was cringing internally.  
“Carlos?”  
“I said yes, but only because Nilanjana and I had a bet.” Carlos was just digging his hole deeper and deeper.  
“What kind of bet w-”  
“Nothing! It doesn’t matter. Let’s just get back to the Tiramisu.” Carlos hit himself mentally. Why was he like this?  
Luckily, he didn’t have to weasel his way out of the conversation any more, as a shriek rung out through the room.

Everyone snapped their heads to the source of the noise. There stood Dana, covered head to toe in partially made Tiramisu. “Oh goddamnit!” she cursed at herself.

Mr. Harlan was looking like he regretted ever welcoming these children into his kitchen. He began frantically scraping the food off the wall. 

Maureen grimaced. “Well, so much for the Harlan-as-our-sponsor avenue.

**Author's Note:**

> if you have any title suggestions or ideas on how to incorporate certain characters into the story, please feel free to comment below. Thanks! :)


End file.
